Infinitely Losing My Edge

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Yeah, I'm losing my edge.
I'm losing my edge.
The kids are coming up from behind.
I'm losing my edge.
I'm losing my edge to the kids from Togo and from Lille.
But I was there.

I was there in 1965.
I was there at the first Beefheart show in Lancaster.
I'm losing my edge.
I'm losing my edge to the kids whose footsteps I hear when they get on the decks.
I'm losing my edge to the internet seekers who can tell me every member of every good group from 1966 to 1979.
I'm losing my edge.

To all the kids in Johannesburg and Lyon.
I'm losing my edge to the art-school Tehran kids in little jackets and borrowed nostalgia for the unremembered nineties.

I'm losing my edge.
I'm losing my edge.
I can hear the footsteps every night on the decks.
But I was there.

I was there in 1968 at the first Can practice in a loft in Cologne.
I was working on the harpsichord sounds with much patience.
I was there when Michael McDonald started up his first band.
I told him, "Don't do it that way. You'll never make a dime."
I was there.
I was the first guy playing Con Funk Shun to the funk kids.
I played it at Cafe Wha.
Everybody thought I was crazy.
We all know.
I was there.
I was there.
I've never been wrong.

But I'm losing my edge to better-looking people with better ideas and more talent.
And they're actually really, really nice.

I'm losing my edge.

I heard you have a compilation of every good song ever done by anybody.
Every great song by Scan 7. All the underground hits.

All Bill Wells tracks. I heard you have a vinyl of every Blancmange record on German import.

I heard that you have a white label of every seminal funk hit - 1985, '86, '87.
I heard that you have a CD compilation of every good '60s cut and another box set from the '70s.

I hear you're buying a clarinet and an oboe and are throwing your macbook out the window because you want to make something real. You want to make a The Kinks record.

I hear that you and your band have sold your linndrum and bought a sitar.
I hear that you and your band have sold your sitar and bought a linndrum.

I hear everybody that you know is more relevant than everybody that I know.

But have you seen my records?

Amon Düül II, Donny Hathaway, Kas Product, Brand Nubian, Grey Daturas, Half Japanese, The Residents, Dave Gahan, the Fania All-Stars, Tropical Tobacco, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark, Boogie Down Productions, Röyhkä ja Rättö ja Lehtisalo, Barrington Levy, The Peanut Butter Conspiracy, Gang of Four, Quantec, David Axelrod, Siglo XX, Ajijia Myrayebe, Glambeats Corp., Sparks, Erasure, Jeff Lynne, Visage, Kings Of Tomorrow, Pet Shop Boys, Harmonia, The Searchers, Nils Olav, Judy Mowatt, Spandau Ballet, Barry Ungar, Stockholm Monsters, 10cc, Roxette, Clear Light, Bang on a Can All-Stars, The Detroit Cobras, The Names, Hot Snakes, Joyce Sims, Joe Finger, the Bar-Kays, Fatback Band, Todd Terry, Banda Bassotti, Mandrill, Steve Hackett, Davy DMX, Hoover, Subhumans, Archie Shepp, Rufus Thomas, Shoche, Zapp, Jerry's Kids, Graham Central Station, The Fuzztones, It's A Beautiful Day, The Sisters of Mercy, The Modern Lovers, Smog, Mission of Burma, Mission of Burma, Mission of Burma, Mission of Burma.

You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.
You don't know what you really want.

A hack by Matthew Ogle who is very sorry to James Murphy and basically everyone (cheers to Darius and this for the late-night inspiration)